Woman refuses to invite mother-in-law to Mother's Day gathering, resenting MIL for skipping the birthday party she organized for her months prior, husband takes his mother's side: ‘You're being petty’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
May 10, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

Mother's Day is a day that is meant to celebrate all mothers out there, but we can probably all agree that not all mothers deserve to be celebrated. Sure, just the fact that they are moms should be enough, because they have done enough, but for a lot of people, the rest of the family road is not less important than the beginning. Even if your mom is the one who is responsible for you being in this world, that does not necessarily mean that she has been a good mom for the entire journey, and that definitely doesn't necessarily mean she deserves to be celebrated.

Some mothers manage to get their Mother's Day rights revoked by just one disrespectful act. That is all it takes for their families to feel like they do not deserve that dedicated day. Whether or not it is justified probably depends on that one act, but if it is anything like what the mother in the story below did, we can safely say that it is extremely justified.

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  • The woman in the story below has worked really hard to organize a birthday party for her mother-in-law. However, when the day came, the mother-in-law refused to attend because of a different family dispute. This led the hurt DIL to refuse to organize anything else that celebrates her MIL, and that includes this year's Mother's Day.

    Her husband, however, does not agree with this decision, so scroll down to read about his reaction…

  • 01
    Hoppy Mother's Day
    via Susannah Townsend

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 02

    "AITA for telling my husband we will not be hosting for Mother’s Day because of his mom?"

    My husband (28m) and I (27f) have been together for about 8 years and since the beginning my and MILS relationship has been rocky.
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 03
    That being said, I get along with his family very well and share my husband's love of hosting parties and gatherings. Recently there's been a bit of drama in the
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 04
    family due to one of his sisters isolating herself and playing victim stating no one makes an effort to reach out to her. A couple months ago for MILS
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 05
    birthday, my husband had sent out a text to the family chat to invite everyone over. All celebrations and holidays are a potluck in one of the 5 sibling houses
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 06
    with the host family doing majority of the work. despite SIL being in the chat, she complained to MIL that my husband didn't have the decency to invite
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 07
    her. She said she would feel "like an intruder" if she showed up. MIL called my husband to say he should call his sister to apologize for excluding her and invite
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 08
    her formally. my husband simply said she's in the chat and no one else received anything "formal" and she was welcome like everyone else. The day came and I of
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 09
    course did the bulk of the work. Well, MIL never showed up. She told another SIL she would not be sharing a meal with someone who blatantly
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 10
    excluded one of her children. we all chose to have a great time and cut her cake ourselves, and treated it like a family gathering instead of a birthday celebration. When
    via letmeknowplzzz
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    everyone left, my husband apologized for MILS absence and thanked me for everything I did. I honestly felt so heartbroken, because why would MIL not think about
    via letmeknowplzzz
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    the effort that was made? | calmly told my husband we would no longer be celebrating his mom at our house. He said he understood. Today, he asked if we should invite
    via letmeknowplzzz
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    everyone over for Mother's Day. I immediately said no. SIL is still behaving the same, MIL never apologized for what she did, and I refuse to have a redo. It was
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 14
    a few months ago, but the way he asked so nonchalantly triggered something in me. I reminded him we would no longer celebrate his mom in
    via letmeknowplzzz
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    our house. He said this wasn't his mom's birthday. I clarified that anything to do with celebrating his mom is now off the table. Going out to dinner, or taking
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 16
    something store bought to one of his sister's houses for a future birthday of hers is fine, but I will no longer spend hours of my day for her. He asked me for how
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 17
    long and I said it would be a permanent thing. He asked if I had forgiven her and I said yes, but those were my new boundaries.
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 18
    HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY
    via kirin_photo
  • 19
    He said that's not how it works and accused me of harboring resentment from years ago to make this a bigger problem. We ended the conversation with him agreeing we would not be
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 20
    hosting for Mother's Day, but he said he felt I was being petty. I might be, but the more I think about it, the more I feel like I'm not wrong for this boundary. So, AITA?
    via letmeknowplzzz
  • 21
    Pure-Philosopher-175 NTA. Both MIL and SIL sound r de and childish - the apple didn't fall far from the tree there. You made it clear to your husband about your boundary for your hosting future events for MIL and he is now back-pedalling.
    via Pure-Philosopher-175
  • 22
    If he wants to host, he can do it elsewhere or one of the other 4 siblings can step up. If SIL wants to be included, why can't she host? The whole family just sounds exhausting.
    via Pure-Philosopher-175
  • 23
    Equivalent Reason894 Tell him if your MIL is coming over, he can do all the cleaning, shopping, and food prep for the occasion, but you won't be putting in that effort for someone who doesn't appreciate it. My guess is he'll nope right out of that idea.
    via Equivalent_Reason894
  • 24
    Anxious_Reporter_601 Omg NTA. How is your husband not getting this??
    via Anxious_Reporter_601
  • 25
    Otherwise-Topic-1791 NTA. "Forgive and forget", and "turn the other cheek" doesn't mean you have to let them hit you again.
    via Otherwise-Topic-1791

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family drama daughter in law aita kids mother siblings reddit story mothers day parenting mother in law family sister Reddit women parents children Father
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